8 x 4 = 32 = something good
how about this one? 
can anyone guess her age in each photo? well, i've tried to find glib ways to put this, but none of them strikes the right tone, so i'll play it straight and say it. Today is my 32nd birthday. i basically look the same as above, only in an adult's body now.
it feels weird to say "32", but i'm sure the year ahead will kick ass. it's weird, i guess i had this long-held image of what 32 would be like for me, and where i'd be ten years out of college. incidentally, this year is my 10-year class reunion, and though i'm unable to travel to my alma mater later this month to reconnect w/ people, i've found that it all gives me pause. i have some notions as to why�simmering feelings of panic that i'm still paying off school loans, still feeling shy when i don't know anyone in a room, or the fact that i still sometimes have the humor of a 12 year old boy!
maybe i had this idea of what my 30's were supposed to feel like and now that i'm there, i don't feel "that" way. and then, i realize that i can think of 30 different 30-somethings who are all living different, but equally excellent lives. what i'm trying to say is that maybe i thought i'd have all the answers and every detail already in place by now, come to find out that no one ever has all the answers or details perfectly lined up. if i've learned one important thing in the past ten years, esp given unique path my health issues laid before me, it's that it's OK to be a work-in-progress, regardless of age. everyone should strive to keep learning and growing, b/c otherwise you stagnate. so i feel excitement & optimism at the arrival of some big changes in my 32nd year.
and now the fun stuff: the older i get, the longer my celebrations draw out, with separate gatherings/celebrations with friends, family, and people at work. there was an early cake this past weekend, and there will probably be one later this week at work. i declared today my own personal holiday: i made an aveda appointment, and won't go to work until wednesday. how's that for 32? tonight, i get thai food & maybe riesling.
and finally, here's the (condensed) story of my arrival: my mom wasn�t due until may 21st, but since i was a scheduled c-section baby (thanks to my older sister being born six weeks ahead of schedule), the OB didn't want to take any chances. he had arranged to deliver me on may 16th, but i just wouldn't wait another day. in the wee hours of wednesday may 15, 1974, my mom's water broke, and there was no time to waste. by 6:32 a.m., i had arrived via c-section as an 18 inch long, 6 lb 12 oz. bundle of joy.
