questioning

questions i ask: guardian angels--is there really such a thing?

is there someone out there listening somewhere? are there answers for me or will i keep searching?

is there a guardian angel to watch out for me?

is there some reassurance that in the end, things will be okay?

can i regain my strength and resolve to continue fighting bravely, the way i have been ever since 1994 when this monster first reared its ugly head?

will things always be bad or will i weather the storm and emerge physicially stronger than ever?

are there sunny days ahead for me?

will i return to wellness and be able to get on with my life instead of having to make plans upon a shaky foundation of sand?

all of the taken-for-grantedness of things is gone. there is no sense of normalcy and i want some semblance of it back in my life.

is someone, something, somewhere looking out for me and giving me renewed strength so i can find my way back to better times and health?

is there such a thing as a guardian spirit? or anything like it?

i have to force myself to believe that things won't stay this bad forever. it's the only way i can survive and persevere from one day to the next.