insomnia

i seriously cannot believe i'm up this late. i'm never up this late. it's almost 2am, for crying out loud.

i just got off the phone w/ my sister, but for her it's still just 11pm. she's such a sweetheart and talking to her made me a tad bit happier. she was surprised to hear from me b/c it's so late here.

i'm awake b/c my joint pain is so unbearable i can't fall sleep. i'm so uncomfortable right now. my legs and hip joints hurt no matter how i lie down. vioxx only does so much. darvocet only does so much.

the methotrexate/remicade treatment decision is weighing heavily on my mind. i'm losing sleep over it...they're strong chemicals. do i act like a trooper and go through w/ it now, or wait until things progress?

i have to be up early. hopefully my trip is a welcome getaway--forget my troubles for a day or two. i'm off to bed.